Wife cheating on her husband with her best friend: reasons, consequences, what to do? Why do unfaithful wives cheat on their husband's friend?

It is believed that male friendship is stronger than female friendship. In a situation where a wife cheated on her husband with a friend, his friend is always guilty. It is the betrayal of this person that will be especially painful. As for his wife, the man may forgive her, wanting to save the family. But a comrade who stepped over their friendship will never be able to understand. The common male world will collapse when the truth about his betrayal is revealed.

Why did this happen?

The reasons why a married and happily married woman cheats with her family's best friend can be different. The most common:

1. A woman does not feel the same love for her husband and does not receive pleasure from his caresses. A wife who loves her husband will never cheat.
2. She looked at his friend with different eyes and at some point realized that she had fallen in love like a girl.
3. The lady decided to take revenge on her husband. If she suspects him of cheating, she will want to answer in the most insidious way - with his friend.
4. This is not her first betrayal. This means that the woman is not distinguished by deep moral qualities, and this is her next intrigue.
5. After a large and clearly excessive dose of alcohol, the wife could not refuse an insistent man who often visits the house and with whom she has close friendly relations.

Regardless of the reason, it will not be possible to ignore the fact of betrayal. You can’t pretend that nothing happened, after all, this is betrayal on the part of loved ones, and silently swallowing betrayal means not respecting yourself.

Married women cheat on their husbands

How to forgive your wife?

Having a hard time experiencing the betrayal of his wife and friend, a man is still able to think rationally and do the right thing. For the right decision you need:

1. Cope with your emotions. Do not wave your fists and do not create unnecessary complications by attracting nosy neighbors and demanding court decisions. We need to calm down and then act.
2. Understand your feelings for your spouse. If the husband still loves his wife, try to forgive and forget about her mistake. If he understands that he will never come to terms with betrayal, then he should not torture himself and his wife, he should break up with her.
3. Calmly discuss the situation. Find out how important your spouse is to their family and relationships. If her feelings cannot be returned, then the best solution is to let her go.

A man should not forget that he himself is to blame for treason. Women's betrayals rarely happen out of nowhere. They could be triggered by the following factors:

1. The man did not marry for love, and the lady is looking for passion on the side.
2. The husband was cold to his wife and offended her. Don’t be shy about showing love for her and being more attentive.

The spouse should weigh the pros and cons and understand what he will lose if they divorce. Perhaps she:

makes him happy;
is a thrifty, caring woman and loving mother;
is perceived by the spouse not only as a wife, but also as a friend;
repents for his behavior and promises not to do it again.

Of course, betrayal on her part no longer makes the spouse a good friend, just like the meanness of a comrade who dared to take advantage of his wife. But we need to remember all the good things that happened before, and life can get better. Perhaps for the sake of the children, she should save the marriage and move on, especially if she sincerely repents of her actions and this has never happened to her before.

What to do with a friend?

In the eyes of the offended husband, the initiator of the betrayal will be his comrade, not his wife. This situation can even become criminal if you don’t control your anger. To avoid problems with the law and financial compensation for serious battery, you should restrain yourself from rash actions.

If you think about it, your friend’s guilt is really stronger. There is no way to justify that she seduced him herself. This excuse is good for single ladies, but not for a friend's wife. When he took such an action, he was aware of how it would end, and understood that he risked losing both of them. Having destroyed male friendships, family and relationships, he forgot about moral principles: his best friend’s wife is a taboo. The man who violates it rarely finds comrades afterwards.

The husband, having learned about his friend, must forever slam the door of his own house in front of him and maintain his dignity. We must break off all relations with him, both friendly and business.

If you forgive him, deciding that all the blame lies with an unreasonable and frivolous woman, then after some time, such a comrade will betray him again. And this will already be the fault of the person who forgave him.

When we talk about infidelity, we tend to think more often about men. However, women also cheat on their partners. And this happens often. The only difference between male and female infidelity is the reasons for the actions. It is not for nothing that people say that female infidelity does not exist, there is either revenge or new love. What should you call it if cheating happened with your husband’s friend? This is what we will try to figure out.

Reasons for a woman's infidelity

As has already been said, women cheat, just like men. But their infidelity is not always driven by the same motives. Another difference lies in the fact that society has an absolute attitude towards the fact that men and women cheat. If a husband deceives his wife, they say that he is a womanizer, that this is a natural instinct. When a wife cheats, it is considered debauchery. But what are the real reasons for infidelity among women?

This is a very subjective question. Every woman has her own reasons for deceiving her husband. And according to a study conducted by Canadian scientists this year, the number one reason for female infidelity is the lack of sexual activity. In fact, 19.5% of women say the main reason for their infidelity is a sharp decline in sexual activity with their spouse. 37% of wives admit that they have one sexual relationship per month.

It can also be noted that women between the ages of 30 and 45 cheat much more often. And almost 80% of women do not divorce their husbands; moreover, they admit that this infidelity saved their marriage. And only 7% feel remorse after committing betrayal.

The Internet plays a big role in this today. Thanks to social networks and dating sites have made it much easier to meet potential sexual partner. The influence of the Internet significantly contributes to gender equality in infidelity.

Cheating with my husband's friend

You can often find cases where a wife cheats on her husband with his best friend. Such cases can confidently be called classics of the genre. Why is this happening? Is it really from huge amount men, the woman could not choose another lover?

The love triangle: husband, wife, best friend is especially painful. For the husband, this is a double betrayal: on the one hand, his beloved wife cheated, on the other, his best friend betrayed him. Cheating with your husband's friend usually does not fit into the basic ideas of female infidelity. She chooses her husband’s friend as her lover for two reasons:

there really are serious feelings between lovers and sooner or later the wife will leave for her husband’s friend;
This is the wife’s revenge, and this is how cruelly one can take revenge for a serious offense - most likely, also treason.

How to catch your wife being unfaithful

Like any unfaithful person, behavior changes when cheating. Here are some of the potential signs of infidelity:

changes in appearance: she began to take more care of herself, began to visit beauty salons more often, and buy new clothes;
decreased sexual activity: you make love very rarely, and you get the impression that she does it reluctantly;
violation of the schedule: outings with friends or sporting events double, delays at work, business trips;
Be careful when handling your phone or computer: passwords, secret correspondence, calls in the bathroom.

Carefully observing your wife can help you understand whether there is another man in her life besides you. Remember that a woman is rarely limited to a one-time relationship. Most likely, this is an affair in which she is looking for something that she is missing in her marriage. Therefore, sooner or later she loses her vigilance and gives herself away.

What to do if your wife cheated with your best friend?

Regardless of what pushed the wife to cheat with her husband’s friend, this is betrayal, this is serious damage family life. The decision in this case can only be made by the husband (unless, of course, the wife has already left him).

There are also two solutions: forgive your wife or divorce her. It all depends on many factors:

how the wife justifies her action;
does he feel guilty?
whether he asks to forgive her;
does she want to stay in the family or get a divorce;
do you have feelings for her;
what do you actually want: a divorce or saving the family.

In this case, the wisest thing to do is to talk frankly with your wife, hear her arguments, understand what she was missing in the marriage, since she committed adultery. If the shock is too great, it is recommended to seek professional help from a family psychologist.

If we talk about a friend, or more precisely about who was your best friend, the situation here is clear. Friendship with this person is out of the question. Let's say this is not even love, but a one-time relationship, your wife herself seduced him in order to annoy you and as a result, your family is heading for divorce. But can you trust this man? Where is the guarantee that he won’t do the same thing when you have a relationship?

You must understand that a man, in principle, will never even look at his friend’s wife. Therefore, it is wiser for a woman who wants to cheat on her husband with his best friend to abandon this idea. The husband may forgive his wife, but betrayal of a person with whom so much has been experienced, to whom many secrets and secrets were trusted, who supported him in moments of joy and sadness, is almost impossible. If a husband catches such a betrayal, it can turn into a tragedy: in a state of passion, you can not only punch a friend in the face, but even kill him. The whole point is that the husband will shift the blame for what happened onto his friend. Okay, wife, she’s a woman, stupid, unlucky, but here’s a friend...

That is why it is better to choose anyone as a lover, but not your husband’s friend.

What men say who had sex with a friend's wife

If a woman, taking her husband away from her friend’s family, thinks only about herself and her happiness, then with men the situation is different. For men, friendship is sacred, so they also deeply feel the connection with their best friend’s wife. But what pushes them to do this? Most often this is a matter of chance, temptation, because, as you know, the forbidden fruit is sweet. Many men admit that they do this out of pity for women, because often wives complain about their husbands to their friends. And, of course, the main reason for such a connection is the feelings that have arisen for the woman. Yes, it really happens that I fell in love with my best friend’s wife. If these feelings are mutual, then it is very difficult to resist them.

How to avoid betrayal in the family

It doesn’t matter who this person is, a family friend or any other man, but if your wife is cheating on you with him, then your marriage is far from ideal. This means that there are problems in the family and not only the spouse is to blame for them. Think about what pushes her to take this step. Perhaps she lacks love, care, attention, basic human warmth and participation. Maybe he is sexually unsatisfied. Or perhaps it’s your character and there are often scandals in the house. In any case, you need to reconsider your attitude towards marriage. Even if you and your wife are expecting a divorce, understanding your own mistakes will help you improve your personal life in the future and maintain a new relationship.

As you can see, cheating on your husband’s best friend is a classic triangle, participation in which causes trouble for all parties. It is impossible to get out of such a triangle to the benefit of all three.

Cheating is destructive to a family. It's a kind of betrayal loving person. Women and men experience this event differently. It is much more difficult for men to restore self-confidence, since they are still considered hunters, accustomed to winning. There are often cases when a wife cheats with her husband's friend. For a man

This is a double blow, which is very difficult to bear. In such a situation, a person loses not only his beloved woman, but also a comrade.

Cheated with a friend

Everyone has their own situation

On many women's sites you can easily find stories in which women share their experiences about the fact that they cheated on their husbands. Of course, everyone has their own situation, but they can all be divided into several subcategories.

As a result.

In the end, if you didn’t give in, didn’t participate in boring, difficult and meaningless conversations on the topic “how difficult it is for him, how he can’t choose - a wife or a mistress, how ungrateful and bad you are, while your mistress, on the contrary, is very caring, etc.” .d. etc.”, then the husband, having thoroughly boiled in his own juice, tired of his internal monologues, feeling the emptiness under his feet, will certainly press you somewhere with a frank conversation about the possibility of his return to the family.

And it happens that a mistress, driven by his internal rushing either towards her or towards his wife, simply simply kicks out her lover so that he does not get on her nerves, and also out of jealousy and desire for him to finally decide on his choice, of course in her benefit, with which the mistress usually breaks off.

You won’t be able to get out of a real conversation with your husband about his return (but you need to try), unlike previous false attempts. This will be a difficult conversation, possibly with snot, tears and hysterics, your husband will ask to return, and you will allow him to do so, but only on your own terms.

This conversation is the final and very important scene in the action that you have been playing out for so long, and therefore it must be carried out correctly, according to a pre-planned plan.

What happens to a husband who leaves for his mistress?.

So, the man overcame his hesitation and finally made a choice in favor of his mistress with whom he went to live. In the process of getting used to life with new woman he consistently goes through the standard stages, which I will talk about only from the perspective of the return method used by the wife, without touching on various subtle points and options (there are a lot of them), otherwise the article will turn out to be too long.

Euphoria stage.

Everything is great! The man has finally freed himself from painful thoughts and hesitations and has taken a step towards a new life, happier, as he believes, and full of nothing but pleasures! His mistress is also happy - the treasured prize is in her hands, she is the only one who has it, she is trying very hard to show that her beloved was not mistaken in choosing her and not his wife, amazing sex, breakfast in bed, ten-course lunch, romantic dinners by candlelight ... she won’t last long like this, but now at the stage of euphoria there is no point in even trying to drive a wedge between her and her lover who fell from the sky right into her hands for eternal use!

The only sad note that every husband who leaves for his mistress expects with bated breath is the wife’s persistent and always unpleasant attempts to return him. The range of attempts is very wide - from heartbreaking conversations in the style of “come back for the sake of the children, I will forgive everything” to the accompaniment of the sobs of these children themselves, lined up in their nightgowns under the windows of their mistress’s apartment or at the door to their father’s work, to smearing paint on the doors of their mistress (he lives here whore) and even physical attacks on herself.

But “our” wife used the tactic of distancing, and therefore nothing overshadows the stage of euphoria and both lovers calm down. But in vain, as will be seen below. The stage of euphoria can last from several days for anxious and suspicious people, to several months for thick-skinned people who don’t care.

When I was about 14, I was arguing about something with my father, who was the second oldest of 8 children. He told me: “You make any decision made in this house three times. The first time - for yourself, the second - for your brother, who will do the same as you, and the third time - for your sister, who will repeat after both of you. Your brother will treat your sister the same way you treat him, and how you treat her will influence her expectations of others, including her future husband.”

It shook me up and made me rethink my role as an older brother. Even when you're not actively trying to influence others, those who respect you will still base their decisions on how you've handled similar situations. If you are broken and angry, they will behave the same way when faced with trouble. But if you don't get discouraged when times are tough, it can give them self-confidence and hope for the best.

Academic degree

When I was 38, I was wondering whether it was worth spending 2 years getting a degree in radiography. I talked to a friend and practically talked myself out of it. I said, “I'm too old to start. I'll be 40 when I graduate." My friend replied, “If you don’t do this, you’ll still be 40, but you won’t have a degree.” Now I'm almost 60, and the degree has helped me bridge the gap between struggling to survive and living a decent life.

Rule 2: Don't expose your husband

This is the most standard mistake of every deceived woman. Having once caught a faithful person cheating, we strive to catch him again. But it doesn’t even occur to us to think, why do we need this?

We sneak up on my husband’s phone at night, looking for incriminating SMS and outgoing calls. We do the same with our husband’s entire wardrobe, purse, wallet and everything where we can find at least some clue.

Of course, in this case, you won’t allow yourself not to tell your husband about the betrayal. You only need to remember one thing that men are great owners, and that if you have forgiven him for cheating, then he is unlikely to be able to do it as easily as you. In addition, you cheated on him with the person he trusted for many years, and possibly his whole life, so you shouldn’t expect any good from this situation. What were you waiting for? That your husband will laugh at the situation and turn a blind eye to what is happening? Of course, you will get the desired pleasure from the publicity, but will you save the marriage? Remember that revenge never leads to good things!

Now we no longer communicate. He didn’t bother to deal with him, he just stopped communicating and forbade me.

Whether you forgive her or not is not of fundamental importance. There is only one thing in principle - it is no longer possible to live with her.

What to do with your lover? This is the last point in your problems. Who is he to you? Nobody, shit. But you can't do anything to him. And if you can, then refrain. Get busy with more important things. The time will come for him too. It is very likely that he will be the one who will take revenge on your wife. The best friends make the worst enemies. This is the paradox of life.

Dear women! If you are reading this article and your family is dear to you, learn one rule: never, under any circumstances, think about cheating on your husband with his friend! You will read the consequences in this article. They are sometimes terrible.

Dear men! Take seriously your choice in life: your best friend and your spouse, because if they mutually cheat sexually, your psyche will not be envied. And you wouldn’t do such stupid things in life for which you would have to pay heavily.

Your best friend is the main instigator of your wife's infidelity

Why would such betrayal be so difficult for a man? As you know, male friendship is stronger than female friendship. Men often trust a friend not only with secrets, but also share a lot with them: common leisure, business, and much more. Don't come to difficult moment to the rescue of one's comrade is considered the same betrayal as treason.

In a situation where a husband finds his wife in bed, for the man the main instigator of the incident will be his friend. Okay with her walking, but how could HE? For a man, the world will collapse only because there will be no trust in such a person in anything else.

The worst thing is that this situation smells very strongly of crime. In a state of passion, anything can happen, even murder. Women, in similar cases, are often driven by deceit: they take revenge by destroying the business of their unfaithful spouse, rob them completely and prohibit them from seeing their children.

What can you advise a husband who saw this terrible picture and was able to pull himself together and not the knife?! Immediately leave this place without any showdowns or scandal. As you close the door behind you, know that you have disowned your main enemy, your “friend,” forever. You and your wife will figure everything out later.

Never believe the words of a “friend” that your wife seduced him. One can “fall for this” if he is seducing a single woman or a married lady whose husband is unknown to him. Or even if he is familiar, he is not a friend. You really can't resist here. But in this case, when the wife is a really close friend, then this can never happen. This is taboo.

As soon as possible, break off all relations with him - business and friendly. If you forgive him, thinking that “the woman is to blame,” then be sure to expect some other unpleasant surprise from such a friend. But then don’t blame him, but only yourself. After all, he has already made you horned, he will easily make you poor and unhappy.

How to forgive your wife if she cheated with your best friend

Everyone, they forgot, the friend no longer exists. If you haven’t punched him in the face yet, then he definitely won’t want to appear in your life anymore. Yes, and you will avoid courts, prison and monetary compensation. But you learned a lesson that showed you what kind of werewolf friends there are. You will be more careful in future.

Now the wife remains. Why did she do this? Here are the reasons:

Passion surged. Simple and carnal. She herself is horrified by this story and knows very well that now there is no excuse for her, and she has no idea how to behave in the future.
Love. This is more difficult. Indeed, more often than not, women need this feeling to go to bed with a man. Purely physiological sex comes in second place. And it is not clear whether she will want to return back to the family.
Accident. This is when the lady is under the weather. How is he dangerous? In further betrayals, and not only with a friend. And the constant excuse: “Sorry, I don’t remember anything.”

So should we forgive an unfaithful woman if she crawled on her knees and begged for mercy? On the one hand, she made you a cuckold. If you forgive her, then how to live with her, how to sleep? And in general, what will the remaining friends and acquaintances say? A mattress and a henpecked man who managed to forgive such a thing. If others in a similar situation make a woman a victim and feel sorry for her, then the man will most likely be laughed at.

Give yourself time to think, don’t rush into everything. Ask your spouse not to interfere with your sobs for a while. Take a time out in your relationship for a while, and be “cold” and indifferent during this time. Women are very afraid of such waiting times. It is better for her to find out everything at once, make a scandal, and then return everything back.

Now put aside all the negatives of what happened, and think about everything that you will lose by breaking off all relationships. So:

She is a good housewife and mother of children. The family will split into two parts, the children will suffer, and there will no longer be a cozy hearth;
Perhaps she made a terrible mistake in her life, and now strongly regrets what she did;
What do you actually care about this gossip between friends? If the news is not yet known to them, and everything remains hidden, then no one will laugh. And if they are already wagging their tongues, then it is not a fact that the chatterboxes will not find themselves in the same position;

Are you guilty of cheating on your wife with your best friend?

Now let's figure it out with ourselves. What prompted your wife to cheat on you personally? How long have you spoiled her, given her gifts, surprises, or at least compliments? But it is very difficult for a woman without this. Her self-esteem decreases, she feels unwanted and unloved.

Moreover, if there were sins on your part with infidelity, and she knew about it, she could simply take revenge on you. And not just like that, but with someone who is close to her and treats her well. Since your friend was a member of your family and respected your wife, perhaps he simply took pity on her and caressed her. He acted meanly, and his wife gave in.

Of course, you shouldn’t immediately forgive your spouse and buy her a bunch of gifts. She needs to be punished a little for treason - the fact remains a fact. But it’s also not worth destroying the family. You just need to start life from scratch. Little by little, restoring the relationship, he will learn to see a woman in his wife. Your attention to her will quickly bear fruit, and a truly faithful wife will never want to look the other way again. On the contrary, having been scared once, she will not repeat her mistake again.

It's another matter if your wife really fell in love with your friend and wants to live with him. But here I would like to remember one good truth: “If your wife left for someone else, then who knows who’s lucky!”

Published: 03/12/2016

Article about how family friend in the blink of an eye, become a link in a love triangle, the name of which is: cheating with your husband’s friend. Cheating on your wife with your husband’s friend is an example of a common love triangle, where the wife cuckolded her husband not just with someone, but with his best friend.

How it all begins

The situation when women cheat with their husband's friends does not happen right away. At first, such relationships develop during periods of family vacation, some holidays, parties, joint recreation, requests for help with the housework, at home, visits to the family of the husband’s friend (to his wife).

Then, the situation smoothly moves into another stage, in which standard boundaries in relationships are erased, people get used to each other, plus tactile relationships during rest, dancing, etc. All this brings people together and, as a result, often ends in sexual relations.

Of course, this also speaks about the “ostentatious friendship” of your partner in relation to your husband, but nevertheless, your spouse thinks completely differently.

What to do and what to do

A woman who decides to take such a step, in most cases, may never again count on renewing her relationship with her. ex-husband, even after some time.

This is explained by the very nature of the betrayal, which hit her husband from both sides.

I don't think there's any need to explain female half humanity, what is male friendship, about which many books have been written and a lot of filmed feature films. Having decided to cheat on your husband with his friend, you will cause him double mental pain: with your betrayal and the fact that your “beloved” is his friend.

Cheating with a family friend

But what should you do if your husband’s friend first came to visit your husband, first for work, business or other reasons, and then began to appear in your apartment under any convenient pretext in order to see you. During his visits, he cast meaningful glances in your direction, first confusing you with this, then giving you a pleasant feeling.

Well, of course, you are a woman and want the attention of the stronger half of humanity, and the more of it, the more (including from different men) you will receive positive emotions.

Some women do not see anything wrong with this, but they must understand that men understand the response to their views in a completely different way than you think (for you this may be normal). They perceive this as a desire to continue the relationship from a different perspective.

Dear women, remember this and do not give your husband’s friends a reason to receive such promising responses from you. If suddenly you begin to notice the unambiguous glances of your husband’s friends, then tactfully let your husband’s friend understand that he is only interested in you as a friend of your husband, period, and that all your thoughts are only about your husband.

In the end, are there really few other men if you have already decided to cheat?

But in no case, not with your husband’s friends, since you cannot even imagine your spouse’s response if the secret becomes apparent. You can't even predict what might happen to his psycho emotional state at this moment. In forensic psychiatry, this state of a person is called a state of affect.

Remember this and take care of your relationship, but if you want something new, then do it on the side with other men, and best of all, somewhere on vacation. In this case, such infidelities will always be kept secret from your husband, and best friend of the family, will always remain only in this capacity, but not in another.